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20 Enero 2008 Domingo

We went and saw the movie Cloverfield today with S & N. If you plan on seeing the movie stop reading now. Ok so I really liked the movie but then it just ends. They don't explain anything. I guess that is what a sequel is for. Does everyone make a movie so they can make a huge trilogy? Anyway it was enjoyable. Spending time with S & N was also a lot of fun. I mean who knew that N was part of the last winter olympics curling team and got fourth place? :) I have also spent a lot of time updateing and reconstructing my web sites. It really takes a lot of time to get them all to a good place. We are not there yet. But that is how it is, creating takes a long time and then destruction comes swiftly.

18 Enero 2008 Viernes
We had lunch with our friends Creighton and Bobbi today. It was nice to see them again. Over the last semester I had only seen Bobbi once. Back when I was in university with everyone I used to see her almost daily. Our friendship has had to re adjust to our differing schedules; her being a student and working nights on the weekends and me working in the 9-5 world. I watched the show Numb3rs today. I really love how they show a group of mathmeticians gathering and figureing out problems together and bonding over math and being on the verge of discovering "it". I always wanted to have a crew of really smart sort of nerdy people that we could all gather and banter and be on the verge of something big. It has not happened yet. It is hard to get 2 people I know to clear up an hour so we can meet. Everyone is too busy buying stuff and working for the stuff they just bought that the commercial just convinced them of fullfillment if they only buy it. Pretty soon people will hire people to have fun for them as they have to be working all the time. The new OUTSOURCING, fun. :)

17 Enero 2008 Jueves
I am really enjoying this week. I have cleaned and organized my apartment. It is looking a lot better. I have also placed some things to sell on craigslist.org. I don't really need the money but I do need to get rid of the items. I am also reconstructing all of my websites. It is taking a long time. I have the linux project website up and running. I am watching Oprah now. It is a pretty good show. Well I guess I can't say that as I don't usually watch Oprah. It is all about female body issues. Suzie Oerman is on tomorrow. I will have to try to watch.

12 Enero 2008
I went to Meijers today to buy socks for my Grandfather's birthday gift. I found myself walking with quite a bounce to my step and I had to consciously tell myself not to smile. I had to hide my excitement. People don't notice homelss people but if you walk around with a huge smile on your face they really think something is up. Who knew that being layed off could feel so good. I keep realizing that I don't ever have to go back to that office. I don't ever have to be exposed to that ever again. I am so excited.

11 Enero 2008 Viernes
The Lay Off

My employer enacted a big lay off today. I was layed off. I can not say that I didn't see it comming. I did not suck up to my boss. If you work in Collections and you choose to keep an employee that collected 36% over someone who collected 117% that is the reason, has to be. Sucking up to your boss is important. Important in coporate america that is. Well maybe they let me go since I had the lowest seniority. But its collections, I thought it was about collecting money, hence the name of the industry COLLECTIONS.

I am not mad about it. They can keep their 36%ers. It is probably why the company is annualy in the position where it has to lay off people. They act all like oh woo is us and blame it on the business that they are in. Newsflash: hey if you have to do this every year then maybe you should adjust for it in your business plan. When you become known as an unstable company to work for, then good quality applicants won't work for you. Only people without options will work for you. This may work in a one horse town but naptown ain't no one horse town. Anyway I was already on my way out. Did you notice me working on my resume this last week? Oh I forgot to mention the best part...I can receive one week of severence pay. All I have to do to receive it is sign some paper that states that I will never sue them ever ever. Ha ha ha.

Sue them for what? For being stupid morans and not being able to run a business without laying off employees every 12-16 months. I mean really...it is easy our profesional relationship is over, we shake hands and go our seperate ways. It is a standard expectation that an emplyee give their employer 2 weeks notice. This is of course in order to maintain a "good relationship" Thus an employer that needs to lay off people should let them go with 2 weeks pay. So I only got a week severence. Who cares. That is why I have my "oh shit fund". What really upsets me is that my health care plan ends today...on a friday....how can I possibly explore my options and then pick the best one? And over the weekend who will I be able to talk to and set up a plan with?? What if I get t-boned while driving this weekend?? Will I not be covered?

Anyway I will miss some of the people I worked with. I will not miss the employeer nor their way of doing business.

10 Enero 2008 Jueves
I just found this neat website Me and my phones. It looks really cool so far. I currently have the Samsung Blackjack. I love it. Text messaging/ email/ instant messenger/ calender/ contacts...love it love it love! The only thing I don't like is that it runs Windows Mobile so I have to shut it down everday in order to clear out all the junk. The Nokia 9300 really interests me. It has its very own operating system that is not windows.

I also just started my trial version of .mac, so my until March 10,2008 I am trying out the email address of tarraguna@mac.com and I have a mac web site that should be at web.mac.com/tarraguna. Suppossedly just sync it with iWeb and it is real easy to use. It will probably be too easy to use for me so much that I will over analyze it and be like "why isn't this working". I have had to learn how to use verious ftp clients, learn html, javascript and all the Adobe CS3. I will be doing it backward by learning the hard way first and then doing it the easy way. Oh well we will see...

Some people operate on the idea that the less that you tell people the less that they have to discriminate against you with. Don't construct your own prison. You can not control the image other people have of you. The image other people have of you really has little to do with you and more to do with how they feel about themselves.

9 Enero 2008 Miércoles
I arrived at work today to be called in to a department meeting where our boss could tell us his last day is Friday the 18th of Janurary.

Enero 8 2008 Martes
Today I was wondering to myself, "is my writting more authentic because I don't get paid to do it?" I tell myself yes because that is what I want to hear. I am really too emotionaly involved in this question to answer it honestly. So I put the question in more general terms. Do people do tasks/ jobs/ hobbies more authenticaly / honestly / truthfully / better when they are not making a living off of it or getting paid to do it. I thought of prostitution as the first example. Having sex with someone you like has got to have more feeling in it that of having sex with a stranger for money. I don't mean to imply any judgements on career choices here. I am just examining the authenticity of what we do. I can not honestly use prostitution as an example as I have not worked as one.

In my case I have always had the stuff that I enjoy to do very seperate and different from my work. I have always had rather boring jobs. I have enjoyed some aspects of them like people I have met or the environment. But I have never actually enjoyed the work part. I mean who really enjoys serving customers, unloading boxes in a trialor or working in collections and playing with Excel. Maybe if I ever had a job that I would actually do outside of work hours while I was not getting paid then I would have some way of answering the question. I think that when you first start out working you are just working to make money and you are either trying to climb the ladder of success to make more money or you are trying to get more seniority as to have a position you more enjoy. I hope that as you get older and wiser and push yourself through school and gain more skills you start to have more choices of what you can do as a job. With this plethura of choices you increase your odds of actually enjoying something you do for a living.

Enero 7 2008 Lunes
Ein Taxi herbeizuwinken ist überall das Gleiche.

Enero 6 2008 Domingo
Ramona, mi compañera del trabajo, me acuerda de la amiga Kristin del colegio. Debo alejarme de ella. Creo que quiero enfocarme en la soledad, para pensar y contemplar. A quien le importa si no tengo amigos y no me invita. No tengo amigos entonces nadie se lo va a enterar.

I was feeling down about leaving the coast, la playa but I was excited to return to my apartment. Now it is sunday night and I am really feeling down about having to return to work, and not just any "work". I have to return to a negative and boring environment. But I really do not want to write about work and explain why I don't like it, it is a long story. I have noticed that I have too much stuff. I won't be giving away all of my earthly possesions like the origional buddah did years and years and years ago but I will be getting rid of those things not used everyday. I have started to feel bogged down by my belongings. I should own them not the other way around. I feel liberated just thinking about who I will give some of the things to and what I will donate.

I found some interesting blogs today; Boing Boing and An entirely other day and Cultured

Enero 4 2008 Viernes
I am exhausted. I can no longer stay up until 3 am and then wake up at 6 am the following day and expect to function. Maybe I never really could. On another note I am halfway through reading the three books that I purchased on the first. I tend to do that where I start reading 2 or 3 books at the same time. At least this time all of the books were written in the same language. :)

Enero 1 2008 Martes